Showing posts with label Motivational Articles. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Motivational Articles. Show all posts
Wednesday, 30 May 2012
Friday, 21 October 2011
Building your house
An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer-contractor of his plans to leave the house-building business to live a more leisurely life with his wife and enjoy his extended family. He would miss the paycheck each week, but he wanted to retire. They could get by.
The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go & asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter said yes, but over time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career.
When the carpenter finished his work, his employer came to inspect the house. Then he handed the front-door key to the carpenter and said, “This is your house…my gift to you.
“The carpenter was shocked!
What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.
So it is with us. We build our lives, a day at a time, often putting less than our best into the building. Then, with a shock, we realize we have to live in the house we have built. If we could do it over, we would do it much differently.
But, you cannot go back. You are the carpenter, and every day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Someone once said, “Life is a do-it-yourself project. “Your attitude, and the choices you make today, help build the “house” you will live in tomorrow. Therefore, build wisely!
The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go & asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter said yes, but over time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career.
When the carpenter finished his work, his employer came to inspect the house. Then he handed the front-door key to the carpenter and said, “This is your house…my gift to you.
“The carpenter was shocked!
What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.
So it is with us. We build our lives, a day at a time, often putting less than our best into the building. Then, with a shock, we realize we have to live in the house we have built. If we could do it over, we would do it much differently.
But, you cannot go back. You are the carpenter, and every day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Someone once said, “Life is a do-it-yourself project. “Your attitude, and the choices you make today, help build the “house” you will live in tomorrow. Therefore, build wisely!
2 Monks and a Pretty Lady
Once upon a time a big monk and a little monk were traveling together. They came to the bank of a river and found the bridge was damaged. They had to wade across the river.
There was a pretty lady who was stuck at the damaged bridge and couldn’t cross the river.
The big monk offered to carry her across the river on his back to which the lady accepted.
The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk and was thinking “How can big brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?” But he kept quiet.
The big monk carried the lady across the river and the small monk followed unhappily. When they crossed the river, the big monk let the lady down and they parted ways with her.
All along the way for several miles, the little monk was very unhappy with the act of the big monk. He was making up all kinds of accusations about big monk in his head. This got him madder and madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation.
Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk. “How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a female, especially when she is very pretty?”
All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite.
The big monk looked surprised and said, “I had put down the pretty lady at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?”
Moral: This very old Chinese Zen story reflects the thinking of many people today. We encounter many unpleasant things in our life, they irritate us and they make us angry. But like the little monk, we are not willing to let them go away. There is no point in remaining hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over. Learn to move on in life!
There was a pretty lady who was stuck at the damaged bridge and couldn’t cross the river.
The big monk offered to carry her across the river on his back to which the lady accepted.
The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk and was thinking “How can big brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?” But he kept quiet.
The big monk carried the lady across the river and the small monk followed unhappily. When they crossed the river, the big monk let the lady down and they parted ways with her.
All along the way for several miles, the little monk was very unhappy with the act of the big monk. He was making up all kinds of accusations about big monk in his head. This got him madder and madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation.
Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk. “How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a female, especially when she is very pretty?”
All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite.
The big monk looked surprised and said, “I had put down the pretty lady at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?”
Moral: This very old Chinese Zen story reflects the thinking of many people today. We encounter many unpleasant things in our life, they irritate us and they make us angry. But like the little monk, we are not willing to let them go away. There is no point in remaining hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over. Learn to move on in life!
Monday, 3 October 2011
True Love is an Acceptance
It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80′s arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.
On examining,I saw that it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his stitches and redress his wound. While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been therefor a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease. As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked him, “And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?”
He smiled as he patted my hand and said, “She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.”
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, ‘That is the kind of love I want in my life.’
Moral:
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is,
has been, will be, and will not be.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.
On examining,I saw that it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his stitches and redress his wound. While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been therefor a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease. As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked him, “And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?”
He smiled as he patted my hand and said, “She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.”
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, ‘That is the kind of love I want in my life.’
Moral:
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is,
has been, will be, and will not be.
Sunday, 2 October 2011
Things aren’t Always What They Seem..
Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion’s guest room. Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement. As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it.
When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied, “Things aren’t always what they seem.” The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night’s rest.
When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field. The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused. The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die.
“Things aren’t always what they seem,” the older angel replied. “When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn’t find it.” “Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead. Things aren’t always what they seem.”
Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things don’t turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every out come is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later…
When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied, “Things aren’t always what they seem.” The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night’s rest.
When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field. The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused. The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die.
“Things aren’t always what they seem,” the older angel replied. “When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn’t find it.” “Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead. Things aren’t always what they seem.”
Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things don’t turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every out come is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later…
Attitude, good mood or bad mood....
Jerry was the kind of guy you love to hate. He was always in a good mood and always had something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, ” If I were any better, I would be twins!”
He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.
Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, “I don’t get it! You can’t be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?”
Jerry replied, “Each morning I wake up and say to myself, ‘Jerry, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.’ I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.”
“Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,” I protested.
“Yes, it is,” Jerry said. “Life is all about choices. When you cut way all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It’s your choice how you live life.”
I reflected on what Jerry said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that Jerry did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning and was held up at gunpoint by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma center.
After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body.
I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, ” If I were any better, I’d be twins. Wanna see my scars?”
I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. “The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door,” Jerry replied. “Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live, or I could choose to die. I chose to live.”
“Weren’t you scared? Did you lose consciousness?” I asked.
Jerry continued, “The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the emergency room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read, ‘He’s a dead man.’
“I knew I needed to take action.”
“What did you do?” I asked.
“Well, there was a big, burly nurse shouting questions at me,” said Jerry. “She asked if I was allergic to anything. ‘ Yes,’ I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breathe and yelled, ‘ Bullets!’ Over their laughter, I told them. ‘I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.”
Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.
******
You have 2 choices now:
1. Crib about your daily life and what are you doing and be unhappy . . .
2. Enjoy every moment of your life & give in your Best . . .
Keep Smiling Always…
He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.
Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, “I don’t get it! You can’t be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?”
Jerry replied, “Each morning I wake up and say to myself, ‘Jerry, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.’ I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.”
“Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,” I protested.
“Yes, it is,” Jerry said. “Life is all about choices. When you cut way all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It’s your choice how you live life.”
I reflected on what Jerry said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that Jerry did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning and was held up at gunpoint by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma center.
After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body.
I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, ” If I were any better, I’d be twins. Wanna see my scars?”
I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. “The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door,” Jerry replied. “Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live, or I could choose to die. I chose to live.”
“Weren’t you scared? Did you lose consciousness?” I asked.
Jerry continued, “The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the emergency room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read, ‘He’s a dead man.’
“I knew I needed to take action.”
“What did you do?” I asked.
“Well, there was a big, burly nurse shouting questions at me,” said Jerry. “She asked if I was allergic to anything. ‘ Yes,’ I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breathe and yelled, ‘ Bullets!’ Over their laughter, I told them. ‘I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.”
Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.
******
You have 2 choices now:
1. Crib about your daily life and what are you doing and be unhappy . . .
2. Enjoy every moment of your life & give in your Best . . .
Keep Smiling Always…
Which wolf will win? (A Lesson from the Elders)
Grandfather was an elder Cherokee Native American who had a wrinkled, nut brown face and kind dark eyes. His grandson often came in the evening to sit on his knee and ask the many questions that children ask.
One day the grandson came to his grandfather with a look of anger on his face; the child’s anger turned to quiet tears. “Come sit, tell me what happened today”, grandfather said. “Father and I went to the store today and because I helped him, he bought me a present of a jack-knife. It was small but a good size for me.
Here the boy laid his head against his grandfather’s knee and became silent. The grandfather, softly placed his hand on the boy’s raven hair and said, “And then what happened?”
Without lifting his head, the boy said, “I went outside to wait for father and to admire my new knife in the sunlight. Some town boys came by and saw me, they got all around me and starting saying bad things. They called me dirty and stupid and said that I should not have such a fine knife. The largest of these boys pushed me back and I fell over one of the other boys. I dropped my knife and one of them snached it up and they all ran away laughing.” Here the boy’s anger returned, “I hate them. I hate them all.”
The elder Cherokee, with eyes that have seen too much, lifted his grandson’s face so his eyes looked into the boy’s face. Grandfather said, “Let me tell you a story. I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those who have taken so much with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feeling many times. It is as if two wolves are inside me…. It is a terrible fight.
One wolf is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. It will only fight when it is right to do so and in the right way. This wolf stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.
The other wolf is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of a temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing. This wolf represents fear, envy, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, lies, false pride and superiority.
Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me for both of them try to dominate my spirit. This same fight is going on inside you and inside every other person too.
The boy looked intently into his grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which wolf will win?” The old Cherokee simply replied….
“The one you feed.”
One day the grandson came to his grandfather with a look of anger on his face; the child’s anger turned to quiet tears. “Come sit, tell me what happened today”, grandfather said. “Father and I went to the store today and because I helped him, he bought me a present of a jack-knife. It was small but a good size for me.
Here the boy laid his head against his grandfather’s knee and became silent. The grandfather, softly placed his hand on the boy’s raven hair and said, “And then what happened?”
Without lifting his head, the boy said, “I went outside to wait for father and to admire my new knife in the sunlight. Some town boys came by and saw me, they got all around me and starting saying bad things. They called me dirty and stupid and said that I should not have such a fine knife. The largest of these boys pushed me back and I fell over one of the other boys. I dropped my knife and one of them snached it up and they all ran away laughing.” Here the boy’s anger returned, “I hate them. I hate them all.”
The elder Cherokee, with eyes that have seen too much, lifted his grandson’s face so his eyes looked into the boy’s face. Grandfather said, “Let me tell you a story. I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those who have taken so much with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feeling many times. It is as if two wolves are inside me…. It is a terrible fight.
One wolf is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. It will only fight when it is right to do so and in the right way. This wolf stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.
The other wolf is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of a temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing. This wolf represents fear, envy, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, lies, false pride and superiority.
Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me for both of them try to dominate my spirit. This same fight is going on inside you and inside every other person too.
The boy looked intently into his grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which wolf will win?” The old Cherokee simply replied….
“The one you feed.”
Thursday, 29 September 2011
Pair of Old Shoes!
A young man, a student in one of the universities, was one day taking a walk with a professor, who was commonly called the students’ friend for his kindness to those who waited on his instructions.
As they went along, they saw lying in the path a pair of old shoes, which were supposed to belong to a poor man who was working in a field close by, and who had nearly finished his day’s work . . .
Student turned to the professor, saying: “Let us play the man a trick: We will hide his shoes, and hide ourselves behind those bushes, and wait to see his perplexity when he cannot find them …”
“My young friend,” answered the professor, “We should never amuse ourselves at the expense of the poor . . . But you are rich, and may give yourself a much greater pleasure by means of this poor man.
Put a coin in each shoe, and then we will hide ourselves and watch how this affects him..” The student did so and they both placed themselves behind the bushes close by. The poor man soon finished his work, and came across the field to the path where he had left his coat and shoes . . .
While putting on his coat he slipped his foot into one of his shoes, but feeling something hard, he stooped down to feel what it was, and found the coin. Astonishment and wonder were seen upon his
countenance.
He gazed upon the coin, turned it around and looked at it again and again.
He then looked around him on all sides, but no person was to be seen. He now put the money into his pocket, and proceeded to put on the other shoe; but his surprise was doubled on finding the other coin . . .
His feelings overcame him… He fell upon his knees, looked up to heaven and uttered aloud a fervent thanksgiving in which he spoke of his wife, sick and helpless, and his children without bread, whom this timely bounty, from some unknown hand, would save from perishing…
The student stood there deeply affected, and his eyes filled with tears.
“Now,” said the professor, are you not much better pleased than if you had played your intended trick?”
The youth replied, “You have taught me a lesson which I will never forget… I feel now the truth of these words, which I never understood before: “It’s more blessed to give than to receive.”
If you want happiness… .For a lifetime – help someone…
As they went along, they saw lying in the path a pair of old shoes, which were supposed to belong to a poor man who was working in a field close by, and who had nearly finished his day’s work . . .
Student turned to the professor, saying: “Let us play the man a trick: We will hide his shoes, and hide ourselves behind those bushes, and wait to see his perplexity when he cannot find them …”
“My young friend,” answered the professor, “We should never amuse ourselves at the expense of the poor . . . But you are rich, and may give yourself a much greater pleasure by means of this poor man.
Put a coin in each shoe, and then we will hide ourselves and watch how this affects him..” The student did so and they both placed themselves behind the bushes close by. The poor man soon finished his work, and came across the field to the path where he had left his coat and shoes . . .
While putting on his coat he slipped his foot into one of his shoes, but feeling something hard, he stooped down to feel what it was, and found the coin. Astonishment and wonder were seen upon his
countenance.
He gazed upon the coin, turned it around and looked at it again and again.
He then looked around him on all sides, but no person was to be seen. He now put the money into his pocket, and proceeded to put on the other shoe; but his surprise was doubled on finding the other coin . . .
His feelings overcame him… He fell upon his knees, looked up to heaven and uttered aloud a fervent thanksgiving in which he spoke of his wife, sick and helpless, and his children without bread, whom this timely bounty, from some unknown hand, would save from perishing…
The student stood there deeply affected, and his eyes filled with tears.
“Now,” said the professor, are you not much better pleased than if you had played your intended trick?”
The youth replied, “You have taught me a lesson which I will never forget… I feel now the truth of these words, which I never understood before: “It’s more blessed to give than to receive.”
If you want happiness… .For a lifetime – help someone…
Wednesday, 21 September 2011
Are you Joining The ' The 99 CLUB"? -- Nice Story..
Once upon a time, there lived a King who, despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content.
One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily
while he worked. This fascinated the King. Why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy? The King asked the servant, “Why are you so happy?” The man replied, “Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don’t need too much – just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies.” The king was not satisfied with that reply. Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor. After hearing the King’s woes and the servant’s story, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club.” “The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?” the King inquired. The advisor replied, “Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant’s doorstep.”
When the servant saw the bag, he took it into his house. When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy… So many gold coins! He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins. He wondered, “What could’ve happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!” He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive. Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection. From that day, the servant’s life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin. He stopped singing while he worked. Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled. When he sought his advisor’s help, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club.” He continued, “The 99 Club is a name given to those people ho have enough to be happy but are never content, because they’re always yearning and striving for that extra 1 telling to themselves: “Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life.” We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we’re given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us, all these as a price for our growing needs and desires.
That’s what is called joining The 99 Club!
One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily
while he worked. This fascinated the King. Why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy? The King asked the servant, “Why are you so happy?” The man replied, “Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don’t need too much – just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies.” The king was not satisfied with that reply. Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor. After hearing the King’s woes and the servant’s story, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club.” “The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?” the King inquired. The advisor replied, “Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant’s doorstep.”When the servant saw the bag, he took it into his house. When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy… So many gold coins! He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins. He wondered, “What could’ve happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!” He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive. Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection. From that day, the servant’s life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin. He stopped singing while he worked. Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled. When he sought his advisor’s help, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club.” He continued, “The 99 Club is a name given to those people ho have enough to be happy but are never content, because they’re always yearning and striving for that extra 1 telling to themselves: “Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life.” We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we’re given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us, all these as a price for our growing needs and desires.
That’s what is called joining The 99 Club!
Eye - Opening Story -- Must Read
A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented
the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took
him to catch them.
“Not very long , ” answered the Mexican.
“But then , why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the
American.
The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs
and those of his family.
The American asked , “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”
“I sleep late , fish a little , play with my children , and take a siesta with
my wife. In the evenings , I go into the village to see my friends , play the
guitar , and sing a few songs… I have a full life.”
The American interrupted , “I have an MBA from Harvard , and I can help you!
You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra
fish you catch. With the extra revenue , you can buy a bigger boat.”
“And after that?” asked the Mexican.
“With the extra money the larger boat will bring , you can buy a second one
and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers.
Instead of selling your fish to a middle man , you can then negotiate
directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You
can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City , Los Angeles , or
even New York City ! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”
“How long would that take?” asked the Mexican.
“Twenty , perhaps twenty-five years , ” replied the American.
“And after that?”
“Afterwards? Well my Friend , That’s when it gets really interesting , ”
answered the American , laughing. “When your business gets really big , you
can start selling stocks and make millions!”
“Millions? Really? And after that?” said the Mexican.
“After that you’ll be able to retire , live in a tiny village near the
coast , sleep late , play with your children , catch a few fish , take a siesta
with your wife and spend your evenings doing what you like and enjoying
your friends.”
“With all due respect sir , but that’s exactly what I am doing now. So
what’s the point wasting twenty-five years?” asked the Mexican.
And the moral is:
Know where you’re going in life… you may already be there…! Be Content..! Be Happy with what you have..!
the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took
him to catch them.
“Not very long , ” answered the Mexican.
“But then , why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the
American.
The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs
and those of his family.
The American asked , “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”
“I sleep late , fish a little , play with my children , and take a siesta with
my wife. In the evenings , I go into the village to see my friends , play the
guitar , and sing a few songs… I have a full life.”
The American interrupted , “I have an MBA from Harvard , and I can help you!
You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra
fish you catch. With the extra revenue , you can buy a bigger boat.”
“And after that?” asked the Mexican.
“With the extra money the larger boat will bring , you can buy a second one
and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers.
Instead of selling your fish to a middle man , you can then negotiate
directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You
can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City , Los Angeles , or
even New York City ! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”
“How long would that take?” asked the Mexican.
“Twenty , perhaps twenty-five years , ” replied the American.
“And after that?”
“Afterwards? Well my Friend , That’s when it gets really interesting , ”
answered the American , laughing. “When your business gets really big , you
can start selling stocks and make millions!”
“Millions? Really? And after that?” said the Mexican.
“After that you’ll be able to retire , live in a tiny village near the
coast , sleep late , play with your children , catch a few fish , take a siesta
with your wife and spend your evenings doing what you like and enjoying
your friends.”
“With all due respect sir , but that’s exactly what I am doing now. So
what’s the point wasting twenty-five years?” asked the Mexican.
And the moral is:
Know where you’re going in life… you may already be there…! Be Content..! Be Happy with what you have..!
Check My Performance -- Nice Story...
A little boy went into a drug store, reached for a soda carton and pulled it over to the telephone.
He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven digits.
The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation:
The boy asked,” Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?
The woman replied, “I already have someone to cut my lawn.”
Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.” replied boy.
The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who was presently cutting her lawn.
The little boy found more perseverance and offered,” Lady, I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of North Palm beach, Florida.”
Again the woman answered in the negative. With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.
The store-owner, who was listening to all, this, walked over to the boy and said,” Son… I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and, would like to offer you a job.”
The little boy replied, “No thanks, I was just checking my performance with the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to!”
He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven digits.
The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation:
The boy asked,” Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?
The woman replied, “I already have someone to cut my lawn.”
Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.” replied boy.
The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who was presently cutting her lawn.
The little boy found more perseverance and offered,” Lady, I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of North Palm beach, Florida.”
Again the woman answered in the negative. With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.
The store-owner, who was listening to all, this, walked over to the boy and said,” Son… I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and, would like to offer you a job.”
The little boy replied, “No thanks, I was just checking my performance with the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to!”
Friday, 19 August 2011
Affirmations: Why Are They So Powerful?
[caption id="attachment_285" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="Life"]
[/caption]An affirmation is defined as something declared to be true; a positive statement or judgment.
Affirmations affirm what is going on inside your mind and your heart.
The garden of our life is developed through the planting of seeds that flow from our mouth on a daily basis.
If you respond to the state of your health, wealth and love life with negative phrases you will end up with a weedy patch for a life.
The good book reveals to us clearly that ‘life and death are in the power of the tongue.’
So to ensure that life is springing up in your garden (life), begin to speak the following phrases about:
* Your health
* Your wealth
* Your love
Here are those that I speak, and I trust that they will add great value to your life as you participate.
My Health Affirmations
* Health is my portion.
* I am energetic and enthusiastic.
* My body heals fast.
* Peace is my portion.
* No matter what has been suffered by my parents health wise, I am healthy, whole and terrific.
* Good health is mine to possess.
* My mind is brimming with healthy thoughts.
* I have a sound mind and body.
* I am well and have ‘well’ days.
* I treat my body as my temple.
* I move freely and forward.
* I treat my body with respect by feeding it healthy food, drinking healthy fluids, and exercising it regularly.
My Wealth Affirmations
* I deserve to have money in the bank.
* My income increases.
* I have an excellent credit rating.
* I am a wise spender.
* I have as much money as I can receive.
* I prosper financially.
* Bills are met with joy as I pay them on time.
* I save and invest out of every dollar I earn.
* I give at least 10% of everything I earn as my way of saying thank you for the 100% received.
* My income is without limit.
* I am creative when it comes to handling money.
* I am financially literate.
My Love Affirmations
* I love me and am secure with who I am.
* Love is forever.
* Love liberates me.
* To be in love is to be safe.
* My lover is my equal.
* By taking care of myself I take care of our love.
* I overcome jealousy by developing my own self-esteem.
* People love me for who I am.
* I deserve to be loved.
* I will develop my own love pattern, not the one set by my parents or my peers.
* Loving both others and myself gets better every day.
* The more I open myself up to loving and being loved the safer I feel.
* My lover and I respect each other and the decisions we make.
* My loving relationships are long lasting.
So go forth and speak these affirmations each and every day. Be prepared for a miracle.
[/caption]An affirmation is defined as something declared to be true; a positive statement or judgment.Affirmations affirm what is going on inside your mind and your heart.
The garden of our life is developed through the planting of seeds that flow from our mouth on a daily basis.
If you respond to the state of your health, wealth and love life with negative phrases you will end up with a weedy patch for a life.
The good book reveals to us clearly that ‘life and death are in the power of the tongue.’
So to ensure that life is springing up in your garden (life), begin to speak the following phrases about:
* Your health
* Your wealth
* Your love
Here are those that I speak, and I trust that they will add great value to your life as you participate.
My Health Affirmations
* Health is my portion.
* I am energetic and enthusiastic.
* My body heals fast.
* Peace is my portion.
* No matter what has been suffered by my parents health wise, I am healthy, whole and terrific.
* Good health is mine to possess.
* My mind is brimming with healthy thoughts.
* I have a sound mind and body.
* I am well and have ‘well’ days.
* I treat my body as my temple.
* I move freely and forward.
* I treat my body with respect by feeding it healthy food, drinking healthy fluids, and exercising it regularly.
My Wealth Affirmations
* I deserve to have money in the bank.
* My income increases.
* I have an excellent credit rating.
* I am a wise spender.
* I have as much money as I can receive.
* I prosper financially.
* Bills are met with joy as I pay them on time.
* I save and invest out of every dollar I earn.
* I give at least 10% of everything I earn as my way of saying thank you for the 100% received.
* My income is without limit.
* I am creative when it comes to handling money.
* I am financially literate.
My Love Affirmations
* I love me and am secure with who I am.
* Love is forever.
* Love liberates me.
* To be in love is to be safe.
* My lover is my equal.
* By taking care of myself I take care of our love.
* I overcome jealousy by developing my own self-esteem.
* People love me for who I am.
* I deserve to be loved.
* I will develop my own love pattern, not the one set by my parents or my peers.
* Loving both others and myself gets better every day.
* The more I open myself up to loving and being loved the safer I feel.
* My lover and I respect each other and the decisions we make.
* My loving relationships are long lasting.
So go forth and speak these affirmations each and every day. Be prepared for a miracle.
Tuesday, 16 August 2011
11 Must Read Life Lessons From John Lennon
“For those of you in the cheap seats I’d like ya to clap your hands to this one; the rest of you can just rattle your jewelery!” John Lennon
I remember hearing ‘Hey Jude’ blaring from the speakers at school when I was a young boy. I was as much caught up in Beatle-mania as the next person. The ‘Fab Four’ totally turned the music world upside down with their vast array of melodies, clever lyrics and singable tunes.
They were dynamic, controversial, trendsetters, radicals, confrontational plus a whole lot more.
But even though I love the cheekiness – as represented in the above quote – of John Lennon, there is so much more that he shared with the world apart from his music. Therein lies a depth of wisdom that I would like to expand upon.
So let us explore together yet another side of the man that encouraged us all to ‘Imagine’.
It has been written that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Blink and twenty years will pass you by. Life is never a direct route. It weaves. It twists. It turns. But if you have a goal, a dream or a plan in place, it acts as a compass that keeps you on track, no matter what detours need to be taken along the way.
Nothing is ever wasted. I experienced nearly 26 years in my life that I call the ‘lost years’, and yet, even though my true identity was lost during that period, the lessons learnt were invaluable. Those years have supplied me with stories that I can now tell to help others to enjoy and prosper from their uniqueness.
Success is not restricted to culture, gender or heritage. Successful people rise up from every conceivable starting point. So we can never use our state of being as an excuse for never achieving great things. One person with a dream, and a willingness to do whatever it takes to achieve that dream, makes it a level playing field.
Dreams are no fun if you keep them to yourself. Dreams are to be shared. Dreams fulfilled are to be enjoyed by all. Whenever I succeed I celebrate it with my family and my friends. I get the greatest satisfaction from the spin-off of my successes and how they positively impact those whom I love.
Reality plus a sprinkle of imagination turns that which seems impossible into something that is possible. If you can imagine it, and you can believe it, you can achieve it. Dare to be as a child once again and imagine by asking yourself the question, ‘What if?’ Then go do.
To love and to be loved would have to be the greatest thing that I have ever experienced. In my darkest hours it has been the love shown to me that has sustained me and strengthened my resolve to press on.
And then there is peace. Solitude and the practice of solitude have constantly filled me with peace. It is the eye in the storm. It is the rock that stands firm. Peace has sustained me and refreshed me. And it is in this place that definitive and life changing decisions have been made to move me forward in life.
Not one of us can do it alone. Without friends, and the support of friends, we live in a desert. For friends are the oases. Friends are the refreshing. Friends lift us up when we are down. Friends believe in us when no-one else does. Friends are there in fair weather, and there when storms rage. Friends know when to speak and when to keep silent. Friends for life.
Stop listening to what others say you are. You are what you are, and the older you get the more knowledgeable you need to become of who you really are. This is your road of self discovery. This is the unveiling of your uniqueness. This is the birth of self-pride – a healthy pride that is proud of what you have been created to be and to do. Listen to your inner voice and stand up tall knowing who you are.
Joy. Happiness. Companionship. Define your life by the company that you keep and by the goodness that you can deposit into the lives of those around you. How do you measure the effectiveness of your life? Make it much more than what you can acquire. Measure it by what you can give.
Nothing happens by accident. There is an eternal plan for each of us, and even what appears to be the greatest mistake will in retrospect be the perfect piece of stitching embroidered into the fabric of your life. Someone once showed me the back of an embroidered piece of cloth. On the back it appeared as a tangled mess. But by turning it over a beautiful piece of handiwork was revealed. So too our lives.
Angry people are angry with themselves. Unfriendly people don’t like themselves. How people act clearly reveals what is going on in the inside of their minds and hearts. People who love themselves have no difficulty in loving others. People who have no problem in forgiving others have forgiven themselves. As a man or woman thinks so he or she will speak. So turn to the cripple within your life and command – ‘Take up your bed and walk!’ Begin to live as the human that was created for greatness. You were never created to be an invalid. Healing is your portion and success is your right.
And for one final word from John Lennon, who was cut down in the prime of his life – “I’m not afraid of death because I don’t believe in it. It’s just getting out of one car, and into another.”
I remember hearing ‘Hey Jude’ blaring from the speakers at school when I was a young boy. I was as much caught up in Beatle-mania as the next person. The ‘Fab Four’ totally turned the music world upside down with their vast array of melodies, clever lyrics and singable tunes.
They were dynamic, controversial, trendsetters, radicals, confrontational plus a whole lot more.
But even though I love the cheekiness – as represented in the above quote – of John Lennon, there is so much more that he shared with the world apart from his music. Therein lies a depth of wisdom that I would like to expand upon.
So let us explore together yet another side of the man that encouraged us all to ‘Imagine’.
1.”Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”
It has been written that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Blink and twenty years will pass you by. Life is never a direct route. It weaves. It twists. It turns. But if you have a goal, a dream or a plan in place, it acts as a compass that keeps you on track, no matter what detours need to be taken along the way.
2. “Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.”
Nothing is ever wasted. I experienced nearly 26 years in my life that I call the ‘lost years’, and yet, even though my true identity was lost during that period, the lessons learnt were invaluable. Those years have supplied me with stories that I can now tell to help others to enjoy and prosper from their uniqueness.
3. “It doesn’t matter how long my hair is or what colour my skin is or whether I’m a woman or a man.”
Success is not restricted to culture, gender or heritage. Successful people rise up from every conceivable starting point. So we can never use our state of being as an excuse for never achieving great things. One person with a dream, and a willingness to do whatever it takes to achieve that dream, makes it a level playing field.
4. “A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.”
Dreams are no fun if you keep them to yourself. Dreams are to be shared. Dreams fulfilled are to be enjoyed by all. Whenever I succeed I celebrate it with my family and my friends. I get the greatest satisfaction from the spin-off of my successes and how they positively impact those whom I love.
5. “Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.”
Reality plus a sprinkle of imagination turns that which seems impossible into something that is possible. If you can imagine it, and you can believe it, you can achieve it. Dare to be as a child once again and imagine by asking yourself the question, ‘What if?’ Then go do.
6. “If someone thinks that love and peace is a cliché that must have been left behind in the Sixties, that’s his problem. Love and peace are eternal.”
To love and to be loved would have to be the greatest thing that I have ever experienced. In my darkest hours it has been the love shown to me that has sustained me and strengthened my resolve to press on.
And then there is peace. Solitude and the practice of solitude have constantly filled me with peace. It is the eye in the storm. It is the rock that stands firm. Peace has sustained me and refreshed me. And it is in this place that definitive and life changing decisions have been made to move me forward in life.
7. “I get by with a little help from my friends.”
Not one of us can do it alone. Without friends, and the support of friends, we live in a desert. For friends are the oases. Friends are the refreshing. Friends lift us up when we are down. Friends believe in us when no-one else does. Friends are there in fair weather, and there when storms rage. Friends know when to speak and when to keep silent. Friends for life.
8. “You don’t need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are. You are what you are!”
Stop listening to what others say you are. You are what you are, and the older you get the more knowledgeable you need to become of who you really are. This is your road of self discovery. This is the unveiling of your uniqueness. This is the birth of self-pride – a healthy pride that is proud of what you have been created to be and to do. Listen to your inner voice and stand up tall knowing who you are.
9. “Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.”
Joy. Happiness. Companionship. Define your life by the company that you keep and by the goodness that you can deposit into the lives of those around you. How do you measure the effectiveness of your life? Make it much more than what you can acquire. Measure it by what you can give.
10. “There’s nowhere you can be that isn’t where you’re meant to be…”
Nothing happens by accident. There is an eternal plan for each of us, and even what appears to be the greatest mistake will in retrospect be the perfect piece of stitching embroidered into the fabric of your life. Someone once showed me the back of an embroidered piece of cloth. On the back it appeared as a tangled mess. But by turning it over a beautiful piece of handiwork was revealed. So too our lives.
11. “One thing you can’t hide – is when you’re crippled inside.”
Angry people are angry with themselves. Unfriendly people don’t like themselves. How people act clearly reveals what is going on in the inside of their minds and hearts. People who love themselves have no difficulty in loving others. People who have no problem in forgiving others have forgiven themselves. As a man or woman thinks so he or she will speak. So turn to the cripple within your life and command – ‘Take up your bed and walk!’ Begin to live as the human that was created for greatness. You were never created to be an invalid. Healing is your portion and success is your right.
And for one final word from John Lennon, who was cut down in the prime of his life – “I’m not afraid of death because I don’t believe in it. It’s just getting out of one car, and into another.”
How To Become A Great Finisher
The road to hell may or may not be paved with good intentions, but the road to failure surely is. Take a good look at the people you work with, and you’ll find lots of Good Starters — individuals who want to succeed, and have promising ideas for how to make that happen. They begin each new pursuit with enthusiasm, or at the very least, a commitment to getting the job done.
And then something happens. Somewhere along the way, they lose steam. They get bogged down with other projects. They start procrastinating and miss deadlines. Their projects take forever to finish, if they get finished at all.
Does all this sound familiar? Maybe a little too familiar? If you are guilty of being a Good Starter, but a lousy finisher — at work or in your personal life — you have a very common problem. After all, David Allen’s Getting Things Done wouldn’t be a huge bestseller if people could easily figure out how to get things done on their own.
More than anything else, becoming a Great Finisher is about staying motivated from a project’s beginning to its end. Recent research has uncovered the reason why that can be so difficult, and a simple and effective strategy you can use to keep motivation high.
In their studies, University of Chicago psychologists Minjung Koo and Ayelet Fishbach examined how people pursuing goals were affected by focusing on either how far they had already come (to-date thinking) or what was left to be accomplished (to-go thinking). People routinely use both kinds of thinking to motivate themselves. A marathon runner may choose to think about the miles already traveled or the ones that lie ahead. A dieter who wants to lose 30 pounds may try to fight temptation by reminding themselves of the 20 pounds already lost, or the 10 left to go.
Intuitively, both approaches have their appeal. But too much to-date thinking, focusing on what you’ve accomplished so far, will actually undermine your motivation to finish rather than sustain it.
Koo and Fishbach’s studies consistently show that when we are pursuing a goal and consider how far we’ve already come, we feel a premature sense of accomplishment and begin to slack off. For instance, in one study, college students studying for an exam in an important course were significantly more motivated to study after being told that they had 52% of the material left to cover, compared to being told that they had already completed 48%.
When we focus on progress made, we’re also more likely to try to achieve a sense of “balance” by making progress on other important goals. This is classic Good Starter behavior — lots of pots on the stove, but nothing is ever ready to eat.
If, instead, we focus on how far we have left to go (to-go thinking), motivation is not only sustained, it’s heightened. Fundamentally, this has to do with the way our brains are wired. To-go thinking helps us tune in to the presence of a discrepancy between where we are now and where we want to be. When the human brain detects a discrepancy, it reacts by throwing resources at it: attention, effort, deeper processing of information, and willpower.
In fact, it’s the discrepancy that signals that an action is needed — to-date thinking masks that signal. You might feel good about the ground you’ve covered, but you probably won’t cover much more.
Great Finishers force themselves to stay focused on the goal, and never congratulate themselves on a job half-done. Great managers create Great Finishers by reminding their employees to keep their eyes on the prize, and are careful to avoid giving effusive praise or rewards for hitting milestones “along the way.” Encouragement is important, but to keep your team motivated, save the accolades for a job well — and completely — done.
And then something happens. Somewhere along the way, they lose steam. They get bogged down with other projects. They start procrastinating and miss deadlines. Their projects take forever to finish, if they get finished at all.
Does all this sound familiar? Maybe a little too familiar? If you are guilty of being a Good Starter, but a lousy finisher — at work or in your personal life — you have a very common problem. After all, David Allen’s Getting Things Done wouldn’t be a huge bestseller if people could easily figure out how to get things done on their own.
More than anything else, becoming a Great Finisher is about staying motivated from a project’s beginning to its end. Recent research has uncovered the reason why that can be so difficult, and a simple and effective strategy you can use to keep motivation high.
In their studies, University of Chicago psychologists Minjung Koo and Ayelet Fishbach examined how people pursuing goals were affected by focusing on either how far they had already come (to-date thinking) or what was left to be accomplished (to-go thinking). People routinely use both kinds of thinking to motivate themselves. A marathon runner may choose to think about the miles already traveled or the ones that lie ahead. A dieter who wants to lose 30 pounds may try to fight temptation by reminding themselves of the 20 pounds already lost, or the 10 left to go.
Intuitively, both approaches have their appeal. But too much to-date thinking, focusing on what you’ve accomplished so far, will actually undermine your motivation to finish rather than sustain it.
Koo and Fishbach’s studies consistently show that when we are pursuing a goal and consider how far we’ve already come, we feel a premature sense of accomplishment and begin to slack off. For instance, in one study, college students studying for an exam in an important course were significantly more motivated to study after being told that they had 52% of the material left to cover, compared to being told that they had already completed 48%.
When we focus on progress made, we’re also more likely to try to achieve a sense of “balance” by making progress on other important goals. This is classic Good Starter behavior — lots of pots on the stove, but nothing is ever ready to eat.
If, instead, we focus on how far we have left to go (to-go thinking), motivation is not only sustained, it’s heightened. Fundamentally, this has to do with the way our brains are wired. To-go thinking helps us tune in to the presence of a discrepancy between where we are now and where we want to be. When the human brain detects a discrepancy, it reacts by throwing resources at it: attention, effort, deeper processing of information, and willpower.
In fact, it’s the discrepancy that signals that an action is needed — to-date thinking masks that signal. You might feel good about the ground you’ve covered, but you probably won’t cover much more.
Great Finishers force themselves to stay focused on the goal, and never congratulate themselves on a job half-done. Great managers create Great Finishers by reminding their employees to keep their eyes on the prize, and are careful to avoid giving effusive praise or rewards for hitting milestones “along the way.” Encouragement is important, but to keep your team motivated, save the accolades for a job well — and completely — done.
Wednesday, 10 August 2011
Nine things successful people do differently
Why have you been so successful in reaching some of your goals, but not others? If you aren’t sure, you are far from alone in your confusion. It turns out that even brilliant, highly accomplished people are pretty lousy when it comes to understanding why they succeed or fail. The intuitive answer — that you are born predisposed to certain talents and lacking in others — is really just one small piece of the puzzle. In fact, decades of research on achievement suggests that successful people reach their goals not simply because of who they are, but more often because of what they do.
1. Get specific.
When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as possible. “Lose 5 pounds” is a better goal than “lose some weight,” because it gives you a clear idea of what success looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal. Just promising you’ll “eat less” or “sleep more” is too vague — be clear and precise. “I’ll be in bed by 10pm on weeknights” leaves no room for doubt about what you need to do, and whether or not you’ve actually done it.
2. Seize the moment to act on your goals.
Given how busy most of us are, and how many goals we are juggling at once, it’s not surprising that we routinely miss opportunities to act on a goal because we simply fail to notice them. Did you really have no time to work out today? No chance at any point to return that phone call? Achieving your goal means grabbing hold of these opportunities before they slip through your fingers.
To seize the moment, decide when and where you will take each action you want to take, in advance. Again, be as specific as possible (e.g., “If it’s Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I’ll work out for 30 minutes before work.”) Studies show that this kind of planning will help your brain to detect and seize the opportunity when it arises, increasing your chances of success by roughly 300%.
3. Know exactly how far you have left to go.
Achieving any goal also requires honest and regular monitoring of your progress — if not by others, then by you yourself. If you don’t know how well you are doing, you can’t adjust your behavior or your strategies accordingly. Check your progress frequently — weekly, or even daily, depending on the goal.
4. Be a realistic optimist.
When you are setting a goal, by all means engage in lots of positive thinking about how likely you are to achieve it. Believing in your ability to succeed is enormously helpful for creating and sustaining your motivation. But whatever you do, don’t underestimate how difficult it will be to reach your goal. Most goals worth achieving require time, planning, effort, and persistence. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.
5. Focus on getting better, rather than being good.
Believing you have the ability to reach your goals is important, but so is believing you can get the ability. Many of us believe that our intelligence, our personality, and our physical aptitudes are fixed — that no matter what we do, we won’t improve. As a result, we focus on goals that are all about proving ourselves, rather than developing and acquiring new skills.
Fortunately, decades of research suggest that the belief in fixed ability is completely wrong — abilities of all kinds are profoundly malleable. Embracing the fact that you can change will allow you to make better choices, and reach your fullest potential. People whose goals are about getting better, rather than being good, take difficulty in stride, and appreciate the journey as much as the destination.
6. Have grit.
Grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals, and to persist in the face of difficulty. Studies show that gritty people obtain more education in their lifetime, and earn higher college GPAs. Grit predicts which cadets will stick out their first grueling year at West Point. In fact, grit even predicts which round contestants will make it to at the Scripps National Spelling Bee.
The good news is, if you aren’t particularly gritty now, there is something you can do about it. People who lack grit more often than not believe that they just don’t have the innate abilities successful people have. If that describes your own thinking …. well, there’s no way to put this nicely: you are wrong. As I mentioned earlier, effort, planning, persistence, and good strategies are what it really takes to succeed. Embracing this knowledge will not only help you see yourself and your goals more accurately, but also do wonders for your grit.
7. Build your willpower muscle.
Your self-control “muscle” is just like the other muscles in your body — when it doesn’t get much exercise, it becomes weaker over time. But when you give it regular workouts by putting it to good use, it will grow stronger and stronger, and better able to help you successfully reach your goals.
To build willpower, take on a challenge that requires you to do something you’d honestly rather not do. Give up high-fat snacks, do 100 sit-ups a day, stand up straight when you catch yourself slouching, try to learn a new skill. When you find yourself wanting to give in, give up, or just not bother — don’t. Start with just one activity, and make a plan for how you will deal with troubles when they occur (“If I have a craving for a snack, I will eat one piece of fresh or three pieces of dried fruit.”) It will be hard in the beginning, but it will get easier, and that’s the whole point. As your strength grows, you can take on more challenges and step-up your self-control workout.
8. Don’t tempt fate.
No matter how strong your willpower muscle becomes, it’s important to always respect the fact that it is limited, and if you overtax it you will temporarily run out of steam. Don’t try to take on two challenging tasks at once, if you can help it (like quitting smoking and dieting at the same time). And don’t put yourself in harm’s way — many people are overly-confident in their ability to resist temptation, and as a result they put themselves in situations where temptations abound. Successful people know not to make reaching a goal harder than it already is.
9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do.
Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., “Don’t think about white bears!”) has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.
If you want change your ways, ask yourself, What will I do instead? For example, if you are trying to gain control of your temper and stop flying off the handle, you might make a plan like “If I am starting to feel angry, then I will take three deep breaths to calm down.” By using deep breathing as a replacement for giving in to your anger, your bad habit will get worn away over time until it disappears completely.
It is my hope that, after reading about the nine things successful people do differently, you have gained some insight into all the things you have been doing right all along. Even more important, I hope are able to identify the mistakes that have derailed you, and use that knowledge to your advantage from now on. Remember, you don’t need to become a different person to become a more successful one. It’s never what you are, but what you do.
1. Get specific.
When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as possible. “Lose 5 pounds” is a better goal than “lose some weight,” because it gives you a clear idea of what success looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal. Just promising you’ll “eat less” or “sleep more” is too vague — be clear and precise. “I’ll be in bed by 10pm on weeknights” leaves no room for doubt about what you need to do, and whether or not you’ve actually done it.
2. Seize the moment to act on your goals.
Given how busy most of us are, and how many goals we are juggling at once, it’s not surprising that we routinely miss opportunities to act on a goal because we simply fail to notice them. Did you really have no time to work out today? No chance at any point to return that phone call? Achieving your goal means grabbing hold of these opportunities before they slip through your fingers.
To seize the moment, decide when and where you will take each action you want to take, in advance. Again, be as specific as possible (e.g., “If it’s Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I’ll work out for 30 minutes before work.”) Studies show that this kind of planning will help your brain to detect and seize the opportunity when it arises, increasing your chances of success by roughly 300%.
3. Know exactly how far you have left to go.
Achieving any goal also requires honest and regular monitoring of your progress — if not by others, then by you yourself. If you don’t know how well you are doing, you can’t adjust your behavior or your strategies accordingly. Check your progress frequently — weekly, or even daily, depending on the goal.
4. Be a realistic optimist.
When you are setting a goal, by all means engage in lots of positive thinking about how likely you are to achieve it. Believing in your ability to succeed is enormously helpful for creating and sustaining your motivation. But whatever you do, don’t underestimate how difficult it will be to reach your goal. Most goals worth achieving require time, planning, effort, and persistence. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.
5. Focus on getting better, rather than being good.
Believing you have the ability to reach your goals is important, but so is believing you can get the ability. Many of us believe that our intelligence, our personality, and our physical aptitudes are fixed — that no matter what we do, we won’t improve. As a result, we focus on goals that are all about proving ourselves, rather than developing and acquiring new skills.
Fortunately, decades of research suggest that the belief in fixed ability is completely wrong — abilities of all kinds are profoundly malleable. Embracing the fact that you can change will allow you to make better choices, and reach your fullest potential. People whose goals are about getting better, rather than being good, take difficulty in stride, and appreciate the journey as much as the destination.
6. Have grit.
Grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals, and to persist in the face of difficulty. Studies show that gritty people obtain more education in their lifetime, and earn higher college GPAs. Grit predicts which cadets will stick out their first grueling year at West Point. In fact, grit even predicts which round contestants will make it to at the Scripps National Spelling Bee.
The good news is, if you aren’t particularly gritty now, there is something you can do about it. People who lack grit more often than not believe that they just don’t have the innate abilities successful people have. If that describes your own thinking …. well, there’s no way to put this nicely: you are wrong. As I mentioned earlier, effort, planning, persistence, and good strategies are what it really takes to succeed. Embracing this knowledge will not only help you see yourself and your goals more accurately, but also do wonders for your grit.
7. Build your willpower muscle.
Your self-control “muscle” is just like the other muscles in your body — when it doesn’t get much exercise, it becomes weaker over time. But when you give it regular workouts by putting it to good use, it will grow stronger and stronger, and better able to help you successfully reach your goals.
To build willpower, take on a challenge that requires you to do something you’d honestly rather not do. Give up high-fat snacks, do 100 sit-ups a day, stand up straight when you catch yourself slouching, try to learn a new skill. When you find yourself wanting to give in, give up, or just not bother — don’t. Start with just one activity, and make a plan for how you will deal with troubles when they occur (“If I have a craving for a snack, I will eat one piece of fresh or three pieces of dried fruit.”) It will be hard in the beginning, but it will get easier, and that’s the whole point. As your strength grows, you can take on more challenges and step-up your self-control workout.
8. Don’t tempt fate.
No matter how strong your willpower muscle becomes, it’s important to always respect the fact that it is limited, and if you overtax it you will temporarily run out of steam. Don’t try to take on two challenging tasks at once, if you can help it (like quitting smoking and dieting at the same time). And don’t put yourself in harm’s way — many people are overly-confident in their ability to resist temptation, and as a result they put themselves in situations where temptations abound. Successful people know not to make reaching a goal harder than it already is.
9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do.
Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., “Don’t think about white bears!”) has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.
If you want change your ways, ask yourself, What will I do instead? For example, if you are trying to gain control of your temper and stop flying off the handle, you might make a plan like “If I am starting to feel angry, then I will take three deep breaths to calm down.” By using deep breathing as a replacement for giving in to your anger, your bad habit will get worn away over time until it disappears completely.
It is my hope that, after reading about the nine things successful people do differently, you have gained some insight into all the things you have been doing right all along. Even more important, I hope are able to identify the mistakes that have derailed you, and use that knowledge to your advantage from now on. Remember, you don’t need to become a different person to become a more successful one. It’s never what you are, but what you do.
Wednesday, 3 August 2011
3 Ways That You Can Make A Real Difference
[caption id="attachment_259" align="alignleft" width="259" caption="You Make The Difference"]
[/caption]‘You’re significant, you’re meaningful, you matter, and you can make a difference.’ Carlos Santana
Never underestimate the power of being you. You are someone of incredible value.
You see things that others fail to see. You understand things that others fail to comprehend. You have a view of the world that is visible only to you. You have a voice that speaks truths and asks questions that arouse discussion that leads to the attainment of greater knowledge.
You are of incredible value – and here are just three things you need to know that are the currency that adds up to such a precious life.
1. Know That You’re Significant
You are not irrelevant. You are not irrational. You are not insignificant. You were born with a mission. And it is your commission to discover that mission and to fulfill that mission.
You were never formed to simply take up space and suck up the oxygen that could have been used by someone else with greater talent than yourself. Who said anything about talent? If you look at others and compare yourself with those around you, you will always come up short.
You are significant. Your actions are of vital significance. Your words are of essential significance. You being you is significant. You are significant, and without you bringing that significance to bear on our world we would be left holding insignificance in our hands. Our lives are transformed significantly by those who accept and embrace their significance, and believe and act as a significant one.
2. Know That You’re Meaningful
To be meaningful is to have a meaning or a purpose. It is to live a meaningful life. For a life lived with purpose will be lived on purpose. It has direction. It has focus. It has attached to it actionable steps that will lead towards an end, a dream, or a goal. It does not meander aimlessly. It does not wake up in wonder – wondering what to do next. It is a life lived under the direction of a compass that guides its path – no matter the terrain, no matter the weather, no matter the impossibilities of the forces that resist its progress forward.
A meaningful life pursues purpose with every footstep taken, every word uttered, every plan made, and every detour explored. For each meaningful thought is another brick added to the foundations of a life destined to be the sound architectural construction that it was destined to become.
3. Know That You Matter
To be needed is one of the most powerful concepts to drive away self-centerdness. And to know that your contribution, your involvement, your leadership, and your being is of vital importance, drives deep the pylons of ‘you can make a real difference’ into the fiber of your being.
Scientifically, matter is what makes our world a reality. Spiritually, matter is the unseen part of you that impacts the physical world that we live in.
For centuries mankind has debated as to the consistency of matter – but all arguments aside – no matter what others think or say – you matter – and it is because of that undeniable fact that you can make a real difference to your life, your families lives, and to the world that benefits greatly from your presence in it.
You, yes you, can make a real difference. So go and make a difference.
[/caption]‘You’re significant, you’re meaningful, you matter, and you can make a difference.’ Carlos SantanaNever underestimate the power of being you. You are someone of incredible value.
You see things that others fail to see. You understand things that others fail to comprehend. You have a view of the world that is visible only to you. You have a voice that speaks truths and asks questions that arouse discussion that leads to the attainment of greater knowledge.
You are of incredible value – and here are just three things you need to know that are the currency that adds up to such a precious life.
1. Know That You’re Significant
You are not irrelevant. You are not irrational. You are not insignificant. You were born with a mission. And it is your commission to discover that mission and to fulfill that mission.
You were never formed to simply take up space and suck up the oxygen that could have been used by someone else with greater talent than yourself. Who said anything about talent? If you look at others and compare yourself with those around you, you will always come up short.
You are significant. Your actions are of vital significance. Your words are of essential significance. You being you is significant. You are significant, and without you bringing that significance to bear on our world we would be left holding insignificance in our hands. Our lives are transformed significantly by those who accept and embrace their significance, and believe and act as a significant one.
2. Know That You’re Meaningful
To be meaningful is to have a meaning or a purpose. It is to live a meaningful life. For a life lived with purpose will be lived on purpose. It has direction. It has focus. It has attached to it actionable steps that will lead towards an end, a dream, or a goal. It does not meander aimlessly. It does not wake up in wonder – wondering what to do next. It is a life lived under the direction of a compass that guides its path – no matter the terrain, no matter the weather, no matter the impossibilities of the forces that resist its progress forward.
A meaningful life pursues purpose with every footstep taken, every word uttered, every plan made, and every detour explored. For each meaningful thought is another brick added to the foundations of a life destined to be the sound architectural construction that it was destined to become.
3. Know That You Matter
To be needed is one of the most powerful concepts to drive away self-centerdness. And to know that your contribution, your involvement, your leadership, and your being is of vital importance, drives deep the pylons of ‘you can make a real difference’ into the fiber of your being.
Scientifically, matter is what makes our world a reality. Spiritually, matter is the unseen part of you that impacts the physical world that we live in.
For centuries mankind has debated as to the consistency of matter – but all arguments aside – no matter what others think or say – you matter – and it is because of that undeniable fact that you can make a real difference to your life, your families lives, and to the world that benefits greatly from your presence in it.
You, yes you, can make a real difference. So go and make a difference.
Sunday, 31 July 2011
Top 10 worst male health habits
From workouts to healthy diets, many of us make an effort to look after ourselves. However, we could be compromising our health on a daily basis without even knowing it. From bottling things up to eating fast food, here are the top 10 male habits you should try to break.
Avoiding the doctor
Research by the charity Men’s Health Forum has revealed that men are 20% less likely than women to visit their doctor, despite the fact that they have shorter life spans than women and are more likely to die from cancer. While visiting the doctor is rarely a pleasant experience, diagnosing most illnesses early increases rates of survival, so stop ignoring those symptoms and give your doctor a call.
Not doing self-checks
Just like with visiting the doctor, many men avoid doing necessary health self-checks due to fear, denial of the risks, or confusion over what to do. However, it is vital that men check themselves regularly for signs of testicular cancer as incidence of the disease is on the rise, particularly in young and middle-aged men. If you are not sure how to go about checking yourself, visit a reputable website or ask your doctor for tips on performing these necessary checks.
Binge drinking
Although women are rapidly catching up with men in the drinking stakes, binge drinking is still more common among men than women, and there are consistently higher rates of alcohol-related deaths and hospitalisations in men.
Binge drinking not only affects long term health, but it puts your immediate safety at risk and can also lead to rapid weight gain. To safeguard your health, it’s important to stick to recommended limits and drink in moderation.
Bottling things up
On the whole, men are less likely than women to talk about their feelings, express emotion or ask for help and support. Perhaps as a consequence of this, men are half as likely as women to be diagnosed with depression, yet are 77 per cent more likely to commit suicide.
Depressed men are also twice as likely as depressed women to resort to alcohol and drug abuse. Bottling up anger is just as detrimental to men’s health, with research suggesting that men who don’t express their anger increase their risk of a heart attack.
Stressing over work
While men and women are equally exposed to workplace stress, according to a survey of 3,000 workers by Medicash, men are four times more likely than women to take a sick day due to work related stress and are twice as likely to turn to alcohol to help deal with it.
As workplace stress can be an important factor in the development of depression, heart disease and stroke, it is vital to seek a way to resolve your feelings and ease your stress; whether it is by talking to your boss, changing your job or seeking professional help.
Taking hot baths
Many men enjoying soaking in the tub, but for all those trying to conceive it may be time to swap those long baths for showers. Researchers from the University of California, San Francisco, found through their three-year study that having hot baths can significantly reduce male fertility.
As sperm develop best in cool surroundings, men should avoid any activity that leads to overheating this area, including sitting in hot tubs or Jacuzzis and regular, prolonged use of laptops.
Not applying sun cream
Although skin cancer is the most common form of cancer in the UK, multiple research studies have shown that few of us regularly wear sunscreen, and that men are the worst offenders.
According to research by Mintel on sun cream use in France, Germany, Spain and the UK, an average of 52 per cent of women use sunscreen, compared to only 37 per cent of men. However, with many men spending significant time outdoor for sports, work or leisure, it is vital to cover up with appropriate clothing and sun cream before heading outside.
Poor bathroom hygiene
Do you wash your hands after you’ve visited the bathroom? According to a study by the American Society for Microbiology and the Soap and Detergent Association, one in three men don’t! Furthermore, a study by the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine carried out at UK service stations found that only a third of men washed their hands with soap. Not washing your hands is the quickest way to spread germs and infection, so protect your health and those around you by making sure you lather up before leaving the bathroom.
Not brushing their teeth
According to a study by the American Dental Association, only 66 per cent of men brush their teeth twice or more a day, compared to 86 per cent of women. Furthermore, research findings published in the Journal of Periodontology showed that women are almost twice as likely to have regular dental checkups than men. Failing to look after your pearly whites is not only bad news for your teeth and gums; research has shown that gum disease can increase risk of heart disease, erectile dysfunction and dementia.
Eating fast food and takeaways
In today’s fast food culture, many of us are guilty of hampering our weight loss by indulging in too much junk food, and this is particularly true for men. A survey by Pew Research Center revealed that 47 per cent of men eat in a fast food restaurant at least weekly, compared to 35 per cent of women. With an average takeaway containing over half your recommended daily calories and copious amounts of salt, do your health a favour by cutting back on takeaways and replacing with home-cooked meals.
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